'Sing!' - that's a command

John Newton’s hymn, ‘I Asked the LORD That I Might Grow’

1 'I asked the Lord that I might grow In faith, and love, and every grace; Might more of his salvation know, And seek more earnestly his face.

2 'Twas he who taught me thus to pray; And he, I trust, has answered prayer: But it has been in such a way As almost drove me to despair.

3 I hoped that in some favored hour, At once he'd grant me my request; And, by his love's constraining power, Subdue my sins, and give me rest.

4 Instead of this, he made me feel The hidden evils of my heart, And let the angry powers of hell Assault my soul in every part.

5 Yea more, with his own hand he seemed Intent to aggravate my woe; Crossed all the fair designs I schemed, Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.

6 Lord, why is this? I trembling cried; Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death? 'Tis in this way, the Lord replied, I answer prayer for grace and faith.

7 These inward trials I employ From self and pride to set thee free, To break thy schemes of worldly joy, That thou mayst seek thy all in me.'

This should be the song we all learn growing up in the church. This hymn tells the truth about life in Christ, a life of walking by faith not by sight, a life of standing firm and not being tossed about by every wind, every wave, every argument, every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God and His goodness and power.

We joke about never asking the LORD for patience, because we know that He will answer by putting us in situations forcing us to exercise patience. We know that God is faithful to train us in this way. Our joking about these things expose that we don’t really want patience, we want a life of comfort and ease.

When we are born again, when we die to the flesh, and are raised to life in Christ Jesus, a supernatural thing takes place. Our desires, our longings, our wills begin to change. We begin to desire patience over comfort. We begin to find joy in temporal sorrow because we believe God’s Word, we trust God’s way in transforming us to be able to experience abundant, eternal joy. We begin to see through eyes of faith with increasing clarity His loving kindness in what appears to eyes of flesh as neglectful cruelty.

The LORD has been teaching me how to pray rightly, according to His will, and not according to my own will, desire or understanding. This has lead to many painful, humbling, and draining answers to prayers. This has lead to me to be able to see just how much more transformation needs to take place in my heart, in my desires, my will, in my understanding and mind.

One of my prayers has been that God would keep me low and humble in writing this blog. Far too many times, I’ve reached a place in my arrogant pride and self-righteousness, when I thought I had figured it out, that I had reached spiritual maturity, I was wise, I understood, I had it all together, and that I was no longer at risk of being one of the ‘weak women’ always learning but never arriving, who should be teachers by now, but who cannot discern good from evil, and lacks wisdom. I feared writing in an 'official' manner would stir up my pride again, and so as I continue to pray for an absolute hatred of my pride, I've also been asking for an absolute love for humility. (II Timothy 3:7; Hebrews 5:12-14; James 1:5)

God has been keeping me low, very low - ‘as almost drove me to despair’, as I sing with Newton.

I’ve found that after each post I’ve posted, I have been attacked all the more viciously with those specific fiery darts that I’d written about. I have felt more of the darkness, more of the weariness, more of my own pathetic weakness.

I have come face to face with temptations to doubt God’s Word of Truth, and temptations to disobey. Temptations to give up, to not endure, to stop striving. Temptations to not care so much, to not be zealous for the LORD's reputation. Temptations to escape, and to be kind to myself. Temptations to envy, to covet, to idolize. “each person is tempted when she is lured and enticed by her own desire.” James 1:14 I have been lured and enticed by my own desires I had believed to be purged out, mortified, and utterly destroyed long ago.

Hebrews 12:1-3, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfector of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him who endured from sinners such hostility against Himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.”

Oh, thanks be to God for surrounding me with such a great cloud of witnesses in His Word and His Church – triumphant and militant, in the communion of saints.

True saints in Christ who are enduring so much more than I am. True saints in Christ who are facing head on real danger of death by not neglecting gathering on the Lord’s Day. True saints in Christ who continually address me by any means possible in psalms, hymns, spiritual songs. True saints in Christ who follow up with my prayer requests, with my confessions of sin and temptation. True saints in Christ who do not regard lightly our unity in the Spirit despite earthly divisions. True saints in Christ who speak the Word of Truth to me in the love of Christ.

Hebrews 10:24-25, “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good work, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

No matter your thoughts on end times, we are all at least in agreement that the Day of Judgment is drawing near. This is most certainly NOT the time to discourage one another by neglecting meeting together; but it IS most certainly the time to ask God to teach us how to better, more rightly stir one another up, to fan each other’s flames of zeal and passion for God’s house, God’s name, and to return to our first Love. This is the time to "set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity". (Revelation 2:4-5; 3:15-19; I Timothy 4:12-13)

Ephesians 5:18-19, “be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the LORD with your heart”

Colossians 3:16, “Let the Word of Christ dwell in your richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.”

‘Breathe on Me, Breath of God’ written by Edwin Hatch

1 Breathe on me, Breath of God, fill me with life anew, that I may love the way you love, and do what you would do.

2 Breathe on me, Breath of God, until my heart is pure, until my will is one with yours, to do and to endure.

3 Breathe on me, Breath of God,

till I am wholly Thing,

till all this earthly part of me

glows with Thy fire divine.